Infidelity is an unfortunate fact of life and affects countless relationships. Most men who have an extramarital affair never set out to do just that. It's something that they find themselves drawn to and if opportunity presents itself and there's an appealing woman mixed in with that prospect, sometimes vows can be broken. Being a man in this position isn't easy. You are no doubt torn between doing the right thing by telling your wife and holding back the truth in an effort to spare her feelings. Once your wife does discover the tryst, she'll be devastated and you'll wonder if your relationship has a chance of surviving this type of epic storm. It does. Learning how to win your wife back after an affair involves compassionate understanding and hard work mixed with determination.
Understanding how to win your wife back after an affair begins with owning up to your wrongs. Trying to hide behind a veil of continued secrecy is not going to be beneficial to either of you in the long run. Your wife needs and deserves to know the truth about what happened between you and the other woman. You may feel shy and uncomfortable with sharing the details of the affair but it's essential that you do. Your wife cannot fully accept what has happened unless she has a chance to absorb it all. These will be the most difficult conversations you two will ever have but they are also the most important. Be strong and as calm as you can be and be open as well. It's natural that the discussions will be incredibly hard for you both but they will also set the stage for healing.
You must also become an open book for your wife. It's normal that she would have many questions about how you are spending your time. This will be especially true if she wasn't aware of the affair and had trusted completely that you were where you said you were. Now that things have come to light it's important that you are transparent about how you spend your time and who you are with. Give your wife the green light to call you whenever she desires. Make it known to her that there is nothing more important to you than rebuilding her trust in you. If at all possible spend more of your time with your wife. You want her to know, without question, that you aren't spending any time with another woman in an intimate sense.
It's also essential that you two have a chance to rebuild the bond that has become strained in the wake of the affair. You need to show your wife, through your words and actions, that you want to be the partner she deserves. That's why it's often very helpful to start courting your wife again the way you did when you two first met and fell in love. Although bringing her flowers may seem trivial, it's not. It's also helpful for you to plan a fun evening out for the two of you. Anything you can do to show your wife that you adore only her will prove incredibly beneficial as you work to move past the affair.